10 Foods to Avoid Before Sex … or Else
It’s Taco Tuesday. You’re a margarita and a half deep, eyes sparkling as they connect with the handsome man across the bar. You can tell you both feel the same way; you’re just half a margarita away from having hot, passionate sex.
But — and it’s a big but — you weren’t necessarily as careful with your menu choices as you could have been. Three refried bean tacos with the works later, and it’s not just the butterflies making your tummy turn.
Food is great, and sex is great, so why not give in to your hedonistic tendencies and enjoy both of them with reckless abandon? Well, because sometimes one isn’t compatible with the other. Certain foods can affect everything from your libido to the strength of your erection to the amount of cleanup you have to do before, during, and after.
So put the fork down real quick and listen up. We’ve got a list of what not to eat before sex — foods you hungry, hungry hunks out there should only enjoy when your performance isn’t on the line.
10 foods to avoid before sex
Want to know how to prepare for sex before your next dinner date? Get ready to start narrowing down your menu choices. Here are 10 foods to avoid consuming before you consummate your date.
We’re gonna go out on a limb here and assume that if you’re a regular espresso enjoyer, you know precisely why you shouldn’t drink coffee before sex. But other than turning you into a slip ’n’ slide, it can also enhance any nervous feelings you might have about boning your new bae, so there’s reason #2 (although technically, #2 was reason #1).
2. French fries
This hurts us to tell you as much as it hurts to hear. But french fries are tragically not a smart play, especially prior to adult play. If you must indulge in pre-sex spuds, opt for a baked potato instead so you aren’t consuming all the oil that might make things uncomfortable.
Although undeniably delicious, we needn’t explain why this foodstuff graces our list. It doesn’t matter what you put in it; a burrito is not date food, and it’s especially not a food to consume before sex. The wheat, meat, beans, and virtually everything else that make this option so tempting also make it a gassy minefield.
4. Cream sauces
Dairy and doggy style simply do not mix. Cream and cheese are high in fat and can easily upset your stomach. Stick with red sauce if you’re out for Italian, but also keep the garlic and spice to a minimum so you aren’t fighting back heartburn while trying to go down on him.
It’s a trap, girl! Most sugar-free gums have sorbitol — a laxative. Something about holding back the metaphorical floodgates while trying to get busy doesn’t quite make up for the minty-fresh breath.
Stick with non-carbonated beverages, lest your belly become filled with bubbles that will be sloshing around during stomach-churning intercourse. Unless you want to leave dinner feeling like a gas giant, opt for wine. We promise we won’t revoke your top card.
7. Spicy food
Okay, so you ate a habanero in front of your date? That won’t impress them much, especially when you’re struggling to keep your erection because you’re too busy staving off acid reflux and indigestion. Overly spicy foods are not an advisable pit stop on the way to ejaculation station.
Unfortunately, you can’t have your cake and eat it, too. Dessert before sex isn’t a wise move. The trans fats and sugar in most desserts can make achieving orgasm a lot more challenging. But hey, if you’re looking for a long time, not a good time, then eat that cake!
9. Cruciferous vegetables
Fiber is a staple in any diet. But it’s all about timing, and pounding down some cruciferous vegetables, such as broccoli or Brussels sprouts, before things get hot and heavy is just asking to fight a losing battle with the methane vibing out in your intestinal tract.
This entry isn’t necessarily about eating it right before sex, but instead being mindful of how much you consume if you want to have a high libido. Too much soy creates hormonal imbalances and can cause some men to produce less testosterone — the hormone that makes backshots possible. So don’t overdo it on tofu. Anything under 120 mg a day shouldn’t harm your hormones.
9 foods you can (maybe even should) eat before sex
The universe is all about balance, so you better believe we have 10 examples of what to eat before sex for a deliciously good time!
1. Oysters and shellfish
You’ve heard that oysters are an aphrodisiac and often associated with sex. That’s all thanks to their high zinc levels, which help the body produce more testosterone. The more testosterone, the more you’ll want to bone; it’s really that simple.
As a general rule, protein gives you energy from L-arginine. This amino acid can stiffen up an otherwise paltry erection. There are countless foods that will teach your body how to last longer in bed naturally, so pretty much everyone can have a protein snack before lying on their back.
Although you don’t want to house a few slices of cheesecake before you’re called to perform, a bit of dark chocolate can boost your sex drive! It’ll also charge you up with serotonin, making you more relaxed and happy. It’s almost as good as exercise!
Pomegranates can increase testosterone production and improve your blood flow, helping that fluid find its way to your penis — right where it belongs. But don’t bother with pomegranate seeds; drink pomegranate juice for a faster and less messy time.
Citrulline, an amino acid prevalent in juicy watermelon, eventually becomes arginine in the body. And arginine is nature’s way of helping you get busy by increasing blood flow to your penis. You can even go with watermelon juice to get a quick shot of that all-important citrulline.
Avocado contains lots of fiber and healthy fats — both of which you need for lasting energy and arousal in the sack. Why do you think avocado toast is so expensive? Sex sells!
If you’re ready to spice things up, look no further than ginger. It’s a great pick if you need something akin to a natural Viagra. The heat facilitates better circulation for a firmer erection and improved sexual health. This should be high on your grocery list for hard erection foods.
This can’t be a coincidence. Nuts basically have it all: L-arginine, flavonoids to improve sexual function, and magnesium to make you last. Where do you think the orgasm got its nickname?
Tea — and potentially even small doses of coffee — might still be on the table. Life is full of little contradictions, huh? A small dose of caffeine can improve your performance and lower your chance of developing erectile dysfunction. That said, it’s probably wiser to go with a low-caffeine tea and avoid overdoing it.
Nutrition for the best nut possible
We’re not here to police anyone’s food choices; that’s what the food pyramid and TikTok are for. But if your goal is to have a high libido, fully realized orgasms, and intercourse that doesn’t make you feel like an over-filled balloon animal, you’d be wise to follow this dietary guide.
Hungry for more than just knowledge? You know there are plenty of men in your area who have something for you to swallow — and you can find them on Grindr.
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